


Psycho, Deranged, and Utterly Unforgettable

by chucksangel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Demon Dean, Depression, F/M, Inner Demons, PTSD, Reader-Insert, idk man, tags have to be so specific nowadays
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-11
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-09-07 20:02:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8814355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chucksangel/pseuds/chucksangel
Summary: You had been dating Dean for a while, but when the Mark began to take it’s tole and Dean became a demon, you had to break up for your safety. As a demon, Dean was secretly searching for you, even if he didn’t want to admit it. So, you had been on the run. When you heard about the Darkness, you knew you needed to keep your distance. So, you kept hunting and keeping busy. But after the huge fight and the disappearance and reappearance of the sun, you knew it was time to face him again. Cas, one of your only contacts, left the Winchesters when he knew they were safe to come get you.





	1. Chapter 1

Walking into your motel room, you threw down your bags and sat on the bed, your face in your hands. You missed your room back at the Bunker, but you’d never admit that. Before you could get any more depressed, your burner phone lit up. And only one person had that number. Well, not even a person. One angel had that number. 

Picking it up, you answer, “What is it Cas?”

“It’s safe! You can come back! Where are you? I can come get you.” his gruff voice says. 

“No, Castiel. It’s not a good idea. I just need to move on.” you reply, your voice merely a whisper. 

“No, I promise! I think he really needs you now, this past year-” Cas began.

“Cas, I-I I can’t!” you cut him off, your voice breaking. And with that, you end the call and turn off the phone. 

Little did you know, Castiel learned a few tricks from the Winchesters, and not even three hours later, there was a knock on your door. 

You immediately pull out your gun, and creep towards the door. You open it a fraction of an inch, just to see Cas. 

You open the door the rest of the way, and put your hands on your hips. “I thought I told you no?” you say bluntly. 

Castiel shrugs. 

Instead of getting angry, you hug the angel. You had missed them all for way too long, and was actually glad to see him. 

Within minutes, Cas had convinced you to give Dean a second chance, and you were off head to the Bunker. 

You got there when it was dark, and hoped that Dean would be asleep. 

“Thanks Cas…” you mutter, shouldering your bag. 

You threw your bag on the floor, and sat on your bed. You took deep breaths; you hadn’t seen Dean yet. Of course, that was not bound to last very long. 

“Y/n?” you hear a hopeful voice say. 

You could only see Dean’s dark silhouette, but you knew it was him. Standing up, you walk closer to him. “Yeah…” 

“I’m so happy to see you!” he admits, his green eyes tearing up. Dean moves forward to hug you, but you quickly back away. You were still used to his eyes flashing black when he would walk towards you. 

“How-how about we just talk in the morning?” you offer, glancing at the clock. It was 2 o’clock in the morning. 

“Alright, y/n. Get some rest, and I’ll see you in the morning.” Dean says, leaving your room and shutting the door. 

Waiting until you heard Dean’s door shut, you turn the lock on your door and climbed into bed. 

You uneasily drift off to sleep, and had your usual recurring nightmare. But this time, it was worse.

You were back in the bunker, running through the halls away from Dean as a demon. He kept gaining on you, and you were hysterically sobbing. You manage to get back to your room, and you lock the door. You put your desk in front of the it, then your bed. None of this stops Dean; he uses a hammer to break down your door. He climbs over your barricade, and faces you.  
The difference this time, was that you didn’t wake up. Instead, he catches you and pushes you against the wall. 

“You like it when I’m rough, don’t you?” he voice was strangely deep. 

“N-n-no!” you stutter, barely audible. 

“Don’t lie to me, y/n!” Dean growls, tugging at your pants. 

“I’m not!” you scream, shivering worse than if you had hypothermia. Before your nightmare could get worse, your brain kicks in and you sat up, screaming at the top of your lungs. 

You hear Dean race down the hallway and try to open your door. You scream more as he bangs on it, going hysterical. You pull your blankets towards you, curling up against the wall. 

“CAS!” you scream, trying not to lose your mind. 

As soon has his name leaves your lips, he is in your room. Cas turns on the light, leaving you blinking to adjust to it. He unlocks the door to let Dean inside, and Cas walks over to you. 

“Are you alright, y/n?” Dean asks, his voice much more gentle than in your nightmare.

Your chest was heaving, and Castiel was soon by your side. He was the only one you told about your recurring dreams to, so he asks, “Was it the same one?”

Nodding, you reply in a warbly voice, “But much worse…” You shudder at the thought, and curl up more at the sight of Dean. 

The voice inside of your head was telling you to run and flee.

“You’re safe now, he’s safe now,” Cas assures you, sitting next to you on your bed. 

As Dean approaches you, you whimper. He pauses, saying, “Y/n… I’m not going to hurt you. Never again. The demon that was in me is gone forever.” 

You insistently shake your head, on the verge of a panic attack. 

With a simple jedi tap to your forehead, Castiel puts you back to sleep. 

“It’s best just to talk to her in the morning. Today has been extremely rough for her.” Cas explains to Dean, gently tucking you back into bed. 

**\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

When you woke up, the world spun for a moment. You were able to drag yourself out of your bed and to the bathroom. After relieving yourself and splashing water on your face, you could clearly notice the dark circles under your eyes. With a sigh, you decide to go out and face your problem-Dean. 

You feet remember the way to the kitchen, so you let your mind wander as you walk. Once in the kitchen, you are confronted with Dean cooking breakfast. 

“I remembered that french toast is your favorite, so I thought I’d make us some!” Dean says, smiling. 

You tentatively get coffee, sipping the warm drink.

“Y/n, do I really have to remind you every day?” Cas grumbles, getting you a cup of water. 

“Wha-? Oh…” you mumble, setting down your coffee for the water. He hand you your pills, and you quickly take them, ashamed of yourself.

“Stop forgetting,” Cas gently told you, offering a smile. 

You sigh and pick your coffee up again, just as Dean shoos you out of the kitchen.

“Go sit down by Sammy, I’ll bring the food out in just a second!” he tells you. 

You go out into the library and sit next to Sam, continuing to nurse your coffee. 

“Hey y/n! I’m glad you’re back!” Sam says with a grin. 

“Thanks…” you softly reply. 

You drum your fingers on the table, waiting for food. When Dean comes out, you stiffen as he approaches the table. He sets a plate in front of you and Sam. 

“Cas, you don’t want any, right?” he questions.

“Correct. It will just taste like molecules.” Castiel confirms. 

Dean disappears once more, only to return with a plate for himself, silverware, and syrup. 

You pick up a fork and knife, pour syrup on your french toast, and take a bite. 

You bite your tongue to keep yourself from moaning at how good it tastes. Sam gives you a sideways glance, and you flush scarlet. 

“What?” you scoff. 

“Nothing,” Sam innocently assures you. 

“So, y/n… How are you?” Dean finally asks. 

“I’m doing well, thank you for asking. How are you?” you easily lie. 

“Better now that you’re here,” Dean admits. 

“I’m doing good too,” Sam interrupts, watching your interaction. 

“What have you been up to since you left?” Dean inquires. 

“Well, just doing a few cases. Mostly just salt and burns.” You admit. 

You glance at Cas, who nods in support. He gives you a thumbs up, easing your anxiety. 

“That’s great,” Dean says, smiling. 

You didn’t know what to say to that, so there was an awkward pause. 

“Hey, I think I found a case for us,” Sam breaks the silence. “And I don’t think it’s a simple salt and burn.” he teases you. 

You grin, and say, “Go on.” 

“Harper Grace, 23, was murdered outside her usual bar in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Her blood was completely drained from her body. Her death is going still undergoing investigation.” Sam continues. 

“Sounds like a vamp nest to me,” Dean decides. 

“I, for one, would love to go kill some vampires. A little monster decapitation never did anyone harm.” You say, grinning. 

“Sounds like a hunt,” Sam chuckles.


	2. Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hunting trip to finish a vampire nest begins.

About four hours into the drive, you begin to nodding off. You move around so your head is against the window, and your legs over Cas’ lap. Dean eyes you in the mirror, but you purposefully don’t catch his eye. Cas doesn’t mind; he knows you need your rest. And _good_ rest, at that. 

Meanwhile, Dean became an interrogator… For Cas. “So why didn’t y/n come back after I got rid of the mark?” 

Cas sighs, and his blue eyes meeting Dean’s through the rear view mirror. “When we found out what happened, we knew Amara had a connection with you. She felt it the most safe to stay away from you. It was for both her protection, but truly so you wouldn’t be baited by her.” 

“But I could have protected her! She was more in danger roaming around outside of the bunker!” Dean says, his knuckles turning white on the steering wheel. 

“Dean, she was also afraid to come back.” 

There was a pregnant pause.

“Why?” Dean whispers. 

“Because of how you treated her after you got the mark.” 

Again, a pause. 

“How did you convince her to come back?” 

Cas shrugs.

“Tell me, _please._ ”

With a sigh, Cas replies, “I cannot tell you exactly why she came back. I said it was safe and she did not want to believe me. But she came back anyway. She probably missed being home, and has always hated running away… and she hoped that you were still you, after everything that had happened.” 

“Running never quite was her style.” 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So should we check out the bar the people keep disappearing from?” You suggest. 

“I think we should check for abandoned buildings first,” Dean counters. 

You visibly flinch, and nod. “That’s fine too,” you murmur under your breath. 

“It shouldn’t take too long, y/n,” Dean gently adds. 

“We can get our motel and do some online searching from there,” Sam quips. 

“Good idea,” Cas replies, nodding his head. 

Dean parks outside the little motel, called “Traveler’s Paradise.” You find the name extraordinarily cheesy, but you stifle your giggles. It was a shitty little thing, but it would serve it’s purpose. On the bright side, you’d stayed in worse while on the run. 

Dean turned off Baby and slid out. “I’ll be back with the key,” he says, patting the hood. 

You quickly follow suit, piping up, “Keys- _plural._ ” You would be having your own room. 

“Right,” Dean mumbles, going into the office. 

After a few minutes, he comes back out with two keys. He tosses you one, and by some miracle, catch it. 

“Five and six,” he says, pointing to the neighboring rooms. 

You grab your duffle bag and sling it over your shoulder. You unlock room six and turn on the light. The inside was clean enough, and smelt like ammonia. You toss your bag on one of the beds and sit down with a sigh. 

“How’s it going, y/n?” Sam inquires, leaning in the doorway. 

You look up at your tall friend, and smile slightly.  
“I’m doing okay Sam, thanks for asking,” you mutter. 

“Well, I’m going to join you in here for now,” Sam states, leaving no room for you to argue. 

You open up your laptop and begin researching, and Sam does the same. 

Barely fifteen minutes later, Sam interrupts your thinking. 

“I think I found their nest!” he declares, grinning. 

You fold your laptop and move over to the opposite bed, where Sam was sitting. “It’s an abandoned building a block away from the bar, and has been vacant for quite a few years.” He explains. 

Dean knocks on the still open door, and says, “Did ya find it, Sammy?” 

Sam nods, handing Dean his laptop. 

“This will be interesting. Minimum lighting, boarded up windows… Sounds like the perfect nest.” Dean admits. “Shouldn’t be too difficult, as long as we don’t have any complications.” 

Dean glances at you, and then his brother. 

“Okay, so it’s like that then.” You snap. “I won’t be a complication. I’ve taken on a nest or two by myself. I am _skilled,_ after all.” 

“Nobody’s questioning you, y/n. You’re fine. We don’t think you’ll be a complication, right?” Sam soothes, glaring at Dean. 

“Right.” Dean simply answers. 

“Are we going to the bar or not?” Castiel says, appearing in the doorway. “It is getting darker now, and it is after ten.” 

“I’ll be bait?” you offer, thinking that it would be good to have somewhat of a plan. 

“No. No way.” Dean immediately shuts you down. 

“Dean, it’s always worked before. Vampires aren’t that smart. A pretty girl, seemingly alone in a bar…” Sam counters. 

“Yes, and we can keep a very good eye on y/n the entire time. She would be safe.” Cas adds. 

“I can take care of myself boys. What do you think I’ve been doing before I was with you guys?” you point out. “Now that we have that taken care of, we should leave now.” 

Without another word, you made your way to the Impala and leaned on the trunk. 

Sam followed you out and unlocked the car. You slide inside, watching as Dean and Cas argued in the motel room. 

“So, do you have your sword?” Sam jokes.

“Of course. I always do nowadays.” You admit with a shrug. 

You pull out the sword, unwrapping the towel that you kept it in. You unsheath the double edged beauty, and offer Sam the hand and a half hilt. 

“I always forget how beautiful this thing is,” Sam mumbles, admiring the jeweled hilt. 

“A dangerous thing of beauty. And a lot of work to keep it in such perfect condition.” You proudly state, putting it back in its sheath as Cas joined you in the backseat. 

“Are we choosing which weapon to die by now? Nice pick Sammy. I’d go for an angel blade though.” Dean chuckles.

“I prefer weapons of beauty rather than just usefulness. A sharp sword is just as good as a machete, if not better. Of course, it also depends on your skillset.” You brag.

“Yes, we know. You know how to actually swordfight.” Dean says, shaking his head as he pulled out of the motel parking lot.

“Nerd,” Sam jokes.

“Whatever,” you sass right back.

“Here’s the plan. I go in first and pretend to be alone, then you all can come in at least ten minutes later so it won’t seem suspicious. If we’re lucky, which we normally are, a vamp will get me to leave with him and I will. Then we can gank him.”

Getting out of the Impala, you flip your hair in attempt to make it fuller and less flat. “See ya in a few!” you giggle.

Without another word you saunter your way into the bar. You slide some cash onto the bar, and order a coke with whiskey. You mutter your thanks and take a sip of the drink, lazily gazing the bar. Though it was getting late, the bar was still relatively empty.

You let out a soft half sigh half hum.

At the same moment, a rather cute girl sits next to you. “Here alone?” she questions with a cheeky grin.

“Yep. You?” you easily reply.

“Sadly, I am. None of my friends would come with me… I haven’t seen you around here before. Did you just move here?” she bombards you.

“Oh, no. I’m just passing through… And needed a night out.” You easily lie, shrugging.

“Oh… Well, wanna dance?” She offers her hand, smiling sweetly.

“I don’t see why not,” you admit with a shrug. You take her hand and go with her to the dance floor and dance. You were never much of a dancer, and this girl clearly was.

“So what’s your name?” you ask over the music.

“Alex. You?”

“Y/n.”

“That’s such a pretty name!” Alex compliments.

You mutter a thank you, and accidentally make eye contact with Dean as they walk in. He raises an eyebrow, then looks back at Sam. You flip your hair, and brush off his look.

“You wanna get out of here? It’s kinda lame…” Alex admits as the song changes.

“Sure!” you say with a shrug.

She leads the way out a side entrance that you didn’t originally notice.

“I think we’re certain to have some fun,” Alex giggles, turning around to face you.

Alex’s teeth turn to fangs, and your pulse skyrockets. “Honestly, love, I don’t see why you even came here. You’re alone. You have no chance against me and my boys. But you’re pretty cute so maybe I’ll let you live.”

With that, someone hit you in the head and you passed out.


End file.
